Not Here
by faerywings
Summary: A word left unspoken.
1. chapter 1

**Not Here  
chapter 1**  
Disclamer: These characters are not mine. I make no money.  
This is slash fiction, so if you are offended, turn back now.  
beta'd by the wonderfully talented yasha-sama  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
I wake up and I'm alone. My legs tangled in sheets, I see the imprint that your body left on the mattress. I take my fingers and slowly outline the depression, my mind slipping slowly back to last night.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~   
  
I round the corner and am nearly back to Gryffindor Tower when a strong hand pulls me into a hidden alcove. _How have I never noticed this before?_ With barely enough time for that thought, a searing heat ravishes my mouth. Your tongue stealthily slips between the slight pucker of my lips, catching me off guard. Responding quickly, I tilt my head and lean in, mouth eagerly reacting to yours, hands reaching up towards your head and burying themselves among silky strands. Tongue encounters tongue as they slip and slide together, roughness of taste buds reacting, sending sparks. Panting and gasping, I break the kiss.  
  
"Well hello to you too," I rasp, still breathless from your wondrous greeting.  
  
"You know you loved it."  
  
Spoken with that ever present smirk. I've grown to love that sneer. And everything that goes along with those lovely pink lips. I swear you must wear lip gloss. You always taste so fucking sweet. Gosh. _That _thought put ideas in my head. Well, that and the fact of a certain _something_ pushing up against my thigh.  
  
"Draco. I can't do this. Not here."  
  
"But I need you, Harry! It's been so long. . ."  
  
A plan soon started to brew in my mind.  
  
"Hmm. Ron's with Hermione tonight. And Seamus and Dean, well, let's just say they wouldn't care one way or the other what happened outside of Dean's bed tonight. Only one obstacle left. Neville."  
  
"Don't be daft, Harry. You know he's with Pansy right now."  
  
"P-pansy?"  
  
"You... didn't know. Oh crap, I hope they're not mad at me."  
  
"P-pansy?"  
  
"She's changed a lot in the past year, Harry. Obviously quite a bit, since Neville's certainly not afraid to be around her."  
  
As we've been talking, I hadn't realized exactly when I became embraced amidst your lithe, muscled arms. And at this point, I really don't care.  
  
"Let's not talk anymore, please? I'm not sure if I can make it all the way back up to my dorm."  
  
"Me either," you murmur into my ear.  
  
Your heated breath burns, and you stick your slick, cool tongue out to trace the shell before languorously devouring my earlobe.  
  
You stop all of a sudden, leaving me nearly moaning for lack of touch. You swiftly grasp my hand and pull me down towards the picture of the fat lady. She harrumphs, still looking as disdainfully at you since the first time I deigned to bring you into the common room. Though she knows better than to say anything. She has seen worse couples come through this portrait hole.  
  
"Mrs. Skrower's All Purpose Magical Mess Remover," I whisper.  
  
The portrait slowly glides open and you start to giggle.  
  
"I told you. We've been letting Neville choose the passwords lately, since he seems so keen on forgetting the ones we try every time."  
  
"Right, right. But that?"  
  
". . ."  
  
I glance in and see that Ron and Hermione are the only ones in the room.  
  
"Come on in guys, it's safe. Everyone else is. . . somewhere. Once Ron and I curled up on the sofa, everybody just seemed to disappear."  
  
Ron was positively red to the roots after listening to Hermione.  
  
"You don't have to tell them _everything_! You can go on upstairs, guys. Seamus and Dean, uh, lets just say you don't have to worry about them."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~   
  
"Oh God!"  
  
I moan as your tongue languidly sketches patterns along my chest. I tense for a moment when I feel that silky wetness delve into my navel. How is it that you always seem to know _just_ what to do to make me fall off the deep end? Given no time to contemplate this, I groan as I feel fingers tugging upon buttons, the straining fabric ever eager to give up what has been hidden.  
  
"Draco! Please?"  
  
I whimper as my pants leisurely slither down my legs, bringing my boxers along with them. Your eyes simply glisten as they gaze at my cock, a few drops lightly weeping from the tip. Slowly, I see your head descending, quite sure of where it is soon to end up.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
I feel you inside me, and I never want to rid myself of this wholeness. This utter completion. I'm overwhelmed with heat, power, strength, adoration, passion. It's seconds before you move again, and quite a few more before a proper rhythm has been formed. In and out I feel you slide, and all I can concentrate on is how much I love you right at this moment.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
I blink and nearly pinch myself, believing, for a moment, that this much happiness could never exist. I _must_ be dreaming. But then I lower my head slightly and see your glowing silver eyes staring at me. _Into_ me. Our lips brush hesitantly before a crushing depth engulfs us, neither knowing who initiated this fervor. I tentatively draw back, gazing once again at your beautiful form, before laying my head down upon your chest, my arms curled around your waist. I fall asleep to your heartbeat.   
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Slipping out of my reverie, I realize I've snuggled down into the hollow that you left.  
  
"Love you."  
  
Words mumbled into desolate darkness. Because you're not here. And I never told you. 


	2. chapter 2

**Not Here  
chapter 2**  
Disclamer: These characters are not mine. I make no money.  
This is slash fiction, so if you are offended, turn back now.  
beta'd by the wonderfully talented yasha-sama  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
My eyes blink slowly open and, for a moment, I'm disoriented. But then I felt your heat, your body, and knew that I could _never_ be lost. Not with you. I sweep my lips across your forehead, lingering on your scar. Most would call it a blemish, disfigurement. I call it lovely, striking. But then I'm not most people.  
  
I use my tongue to spell out a word upon your brow: love. A word yet to be uttered from these lips resting upon your face. Not yet expressed by either of us, I realize. But then, it has to be that way, I suppose. No one knows, can ever know, about us. Except Weasly and Granger. But that was a necessary evil, if we were to ever survive the rest of the year. You knew we could trust them, and I trust you. With how much, you still don't know, and I'm not sure I intend for you to find out.  
  
I sigh and slowly attempt to disentangle myself from your arms wrapped close around me. Kissing the corner of your mouth, you moan and stretch slightly, giving me the perfect escape from your encircling limbs.  
  
Peeking my head out of the curtains, I see that all beds but one are empty. I don't even want to think about that bed. . . Dressing hurriedly, I stealthily sneak out of Gryffindor Tower, almost getting caught by Peeves. Thank God for the alcove though.  
  
As I walk towards the dungeon, I catch sight of the sky through a window. A bare light over the horizon. I tread rapidly now, even though the rest of my dorm won't be up for another hour yet.   
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
At my bed, I undress and slip under the covers, still thinking of you and your   
stunning abandon as you let go completely last night. With just a thought, desire   
invades my senses. That fact alone scares me half to death. But it also confirms what I know to be true. I love you. There's no getting around it.  
  
The more I think of you, the worse my body becomes. It's nearly screaming for your contact. I drag my hands over my body, attempting to mimic your every touch, stroke, caress. I am so glad that I put up that silencing charm the other day. I really wonder what Crabbe and Goyle would think if they woke up to hear me groaning your name between the sobs that are welling up within my body. I can feel them. Bringing my hand lower, I ghost fingertips over my erection, as I imagine your hands, still so new, doing the same.   
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
That first time, your eyes were so big, seeming to say "am I dreaming? Is this really happening?". I held my breath when I heard the first words out of your mouth.  
  
"So beautiful."  
  
No one had ever said that to me. I felt so incredibly loved, even though you were just staring at my cock. At that moment, every hesitation, uncertainty, indecision was stripped from my brain, quickly replaced with desire, longing, yearning. If you had asked for _anything_ right then, I would have given it to you, no questions asked. I had already given you that which was most precious to me, so everything else you would have asked for would have paled in comparison. You still have it, tucked away inside of you. With it, I am yours. Always. No one else can touch me. If you were to ever give it back, my soul would rend in two, battered and shredded.   
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
I'm panting as I realize how quickly my hand is moving, still trying to imitate your actions. My thumb swirling about the tip, spreading the fluid around the head. Bringing my thumb up to my mouth, I taste the sticky bitterness, imagining it came from you.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
That first night, with my arms around you, your head nuzzling under my chin, felt like perfection. Just an overall _rightness_ with the world. I didn't know it, but I loved you then. I wish I could tell you now. Things would be so much better. But for now I have to deal. And imagine that you love me too.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
As I writhe underneath my touch, I envision your face, and how you would react to seeing me like this. It makes everything feel so much stronger, clearer. I come, professing my love for you, wishing you could hear my voice. After cleaning myself up, I grab my pillow and curl into a ball, trying to remember the happy parts of the evening. 


End file.
